Bye bye sunshine state ☀️

The last day of a holiday stinks, feels like you're walking to the gallows. All that sun and fun I'm leaving behind not to mention my family, nae guid. Still, I'll be back again but only if the American authorities will have me, I blotted my copybook when being pulled up for jaywalking and I got the major hump when a shopkeeper charged me tax on my postcards.

This has been more of a fourteen day therapy session than a holiday in the sun. We all face stuff in our lives don't we and some of it can be pretty unpleasant, it's been my turn lately, but what did CS Lewis say?....'Suffering is God's megaphone to get our attention.' We get through it given time and I'm confident that the things I've learned since being here in Florida have set me up for only good things to come. My brother Chris has never been backward in coming forward and has put me straight on a couple of things in his own inimitable way, he's been a real tonic. Donna has been a terrific person to meet too and I've offered her employment as my life coach, she's giving the 8,000 mile round trip some thought otherwise she'll continue as a dog walker from her own doorstep, I don't rate my chances.

What will I remember most about being here? Well in no particular order of importance...I learned that routine is an essential part of life, running does me the world of good, introducing Taisha to a local church was a thrill, so was reintroducing Chris to the game of golf, I've learned how important family is, discovered that setbacks can make you stronger if you approach them correctly, accepted that I enjoy reading bedtime stories more than my audience do, realised God has a plan for our lives (yes that includes you!) we just need to listen to him, I found out jaywalking is illegal in America and if you smile the world smiles with you (dunno about that one, just threw it in to look good.)

But there is an upside to the end of a holiday and that's the excitement you get at the prospect of being in the arms of your children again, they'll cuddle me for a full three seconds before demanding the sweeties I promised. Two weeks is a long time and I'm well excited about seeing them. I'm back in Aberdeen airport about 8.30pm on Thursday to fight through the autograph hunters to the stretch limo that awaits if my agent's been on the case, either that or I'll get the bus to town. Friday night will see me terrorise the lugholes of the Mearns again from 7-9pm, that's if Mearns FM haven't sacked me for going AWOL.

All that remains is to present my holiday song to you and thank Chris, Taisha, Coralea and Erik for the wonderful hospitality and love they've shown me this last two weeks. Over and out for the final time from downtown Boca Raton, Florida.

Couch potatoes rock

First off, thanks to those of you who've been reading my blog. I've had thousands of views and am much obliged, the blog grew longer legs than I expected and it's encouraging to know my mutterings haven't been disappearing into a black hole.

I reckon I'm gonna be travelling home tomorrow with one regret, that I didn't take more time to look around while out here. Apart from running 5k every day all I've done is sit on my fat arse. I could have been to the beach, played golf, tried something different but instead I've stayed indoors. In my defence it's stiflingly hot here, ninety degrees and more, so you don't feel like sightseeing, aircon is your best friend. I've not been a complete washout though, I've read loads, written plenty and drank enough coffee to replenish an ocean, all in a successful effort to relax, recuperate and rebuild. Job done, the challenge now is to continue this positive approach to life when I return to Scotland but when you have God on your side you can't fail 😇.

This afternoon I'm having a farewell coffee with Donna, the lovely lady who introduced me to the church I visited on Sunday. We met during my first week here, she's what us Brits call a lollipop lady and she escorted me and the kids across the road to summer camp every morning. On my way back I'd stop to chat with her and the insights she's shared with me have been really encouraging, she really ought to become a life coach. I feel I owe her a lot, but I don't have a lot so she'll have to make do with a doughnut in Starbucks later, I might push the boat out and get her a chocolate one. I mention Donna to encourage you and implore you to look around and smell the roses because sometimes a person is placed in your path who can redirect your thoughts and be a tremendous force for good, embrace these people who are put in your way, don't let a blessing pass you by. Here endeth the first lesson according to Alexander Russon.

What should I do with the last day of my holiday tomorrow? Brave the heat and get down to the beach? Go on a mega run? Buy some inexpensive trinketry and pap? I've got a couple of quid left so it's odds on that my flight bag will be crammed with Hershey's and candy. I'm determined not to spend another day on my derrière so am all ears if you have any suggestions.

Thank you once again for being a wunnerful audience, one more posting to go (tomorrow) and then you can relax. If any of you write a blog too please let me know, I'd love to read it and advertise it.

With love and all God's blessings to you.
Alex

Heartbroken man 😪

I'm sad to report that hot on the heels of my best day of the holiday I've now suffered my worst. It feels almost too painful to talk about but in an effort to dust myself down and move on I'm hoping that writing about it may prove cathartic.

I've allowed myself in recent time to become besotted by something to the point that nothing else has mattered in my life. My every waking moment, and my dreams too, were devoted in this direction and I never wanted it to end, but end it has and I feel utterly heartbroken. Better to have loved and lost so the saying goes but I'm here to tell you that's a load of bo**cks, it hurts like hell. For yesterday, at around about 7pm British time or 2pm here in Florida, Justin Speith rolled in the putt that signalled the end of the 2017 British Open and with it my relationship with the one true companion I've had since arriving in Florida; the telly. I was welcomed in by a few days Wimbledon coverage and moved seemlessly on to the golf but now, it's Monday morning and I'm totally bereft, just me and Charlie (Chris's pesky black Labrador) for company. I fly home Thursday evening so have four days to kill without television unless I'm prepared to suffer Erik's Disney films or Coralea's Hey Jessie or whatever it's called. Some might consider me shallow for spending a fortnight in America doing nothing but punctuating marathon TV sessions with dips in the swimming pool but I call that relaxation and time very well spent thank you very much so up yours.

Tell you what I'll do. I'll put together the finishing touches to the book I've finished writing since being out here and lay plans for my radio show return on Friday night. I have a guest between 8-9pm,  I hope listeners understand if my snoring is broadcasted because I'll be jet lagged big time. I've been given permission to start a blog for Mearns FM too so I'm gonna plan that today. Perhaps now would be a good time to inform any fellow presenters that keep leaving complaints about my kitchen hygiene in the log book to wind their necks in or retribution will be sought vis a vis my blog so think on 😬.

Over and out from an overcast Boca Raton but not so overcast that I can't do a Peter Kay style bomb into this pool in front of me. That's if there's any water left, Charlie keeps drinking from it the filthy animal.

Blessed beyond measure

I reckon today has been my favourite day of the holiday which is saying something because it's been bostin all the way through. It started with another run and once again I got chatting to somebody along the way, there's a pattern forming, they see me gasping for air and take pity on me. This guy asked me if I was okay and suggested I sit in the shade the cheeky so and so, I thought he was calling 911 when he got his phone out but he was in fact receiving a call. Rather randomly, after we'd said our goodbyes, he called me back to instruct me to watch the solar eclipse on August 21st, he was most insistent about it, but given I'll be four thousand miles from him by then I doubt he'll notice if I don't bother.

Then I went to church which was a tremendous thrill since I took Taisha, Coralea and Erik with me. We went to Glades Presbyterian which is just five minutes away and came recommended, this link takes you to it... Glades. What lovely people there were there, so welcoming, it's just a shame it's a 4,000 mile commute of a Sunday for me but hopefully Taisha and co will keep going back. It's incredible how often I'll listen to a sermon and it feels like it was written precisely for me, today was another example of that and I'm thankful to God. I won't give you the full nine yards but know this, God loves you and has a plan for your life, you just need to open yourself up to it, end of sermon!

And now I'm back in front of the telly as the British Open reaches its climax. I've been proved wrong and the Speith coronation is not materialising, he's having a mare. Looks like an interesting last hour ahead. Chris has been golfing too and is due back shortly, I hope he had a stinker or I'm gonna get a three hour blow by blow account of his round, no bore like a golfing bore.

When in Rome

It was my pleasure to take a very attractive young woman for coffee today, a most agreeable way to start the weekend. The damsel in question is called Taisha and is my sister in law, I figured the least I could do after subjecting her to ten days of my presence was to buy her a drink. We went in search of a diner to no avail so wound up in McDonald's, well, when in Rome and all that, you can't come to America and skip McDonald's. Taisha had milkshake and I had coffee, I know how to spoil a woman. I sent the first coffee back mind, they put cream in it not milk which is a complete perversion of common decency, they made up for it with a free refill though, would love to see the reaction if I asked for that in Aberdeen.

It was proper hot today, scorching, so I took the trouble to spend the day in front of the goggle box watching the golf. Jordan Speith is marching to victory by such a margin that I probably won't bother watching the final round tomorrow, I'll be in church when he's playing anyway, I'm looking forward to taking Taisha, Coralea and Erik while Chris is playing golf. Afterwards there's a chance we'll go to the beach which is a whole different experience here in Florida compared to Stonehaven. I won't need my cardy for a start and the last time I was on Stoney beach I don't recall volleyball and beach soccer being played. I'm not knocking Stonehaven though, I miss the place and look forward to being back but I have five days of my hols left first during which time I intend to complete the following -

1) Developing the body of an Adonis. I've been running and doing push ups every day, people stop me on the street/sidewalk asking me how they too could look so fit, I've told them to check me out again on my last day by which time my mission will be complete.

2) Walking my niece and nephew to summer camp and making them laugh. My jokes so far have fallen on deaf ears, the only thing that makes them laugh is when the lollipop lady ticks me off for jaywalking (whatever that is).

3) Buy souvenirs of genuine worth and not just tat which is discarded the moment it's received (eg. A tea mug that says 'my friend went to USA and all he brought back was this lousy mug' or an NYC baseball cap even though I've not been within 1,500 miles of the place).

Time for another cawfee, much more and I'll drown in the stuff. Over and out fae Boca Raton.

Sushi hell

There's a boozer in downtown Boca Raton called The Irishmen and on Thursday evenings runners gather there for a 5km run which culminates with the serving of a pint of craft beer, or so we thought. Last night I persuaded my brother Chris to join me for this run, he needs to shift a bit of timber and I've gone all fitness mad since coming over here so it seemed a good idea. Thing is though, to our eternal shame, when the appointed 5km run began we continued our game of darts instead, missed the run and drove home to eat pizza 😬. Best laid plans and all that. I felt guilty today so ensured my morning run was further than usual, trouble was I forgot to apply sunblock and you can now fry an egg on my face it's so red. Even the dog grimaced when he saw me stagger through the front door.

In better news I've arranged a super Sunday for us this weekend. I've discovered a friendly church to take Taisha, Coralea and Erik to and while we're there I've fixed my brother up with a game of golf after a chance conversation with a bloke I said hi to while out walking. We got chatting and he invited me for a game of golf but Chris will substitute for me, he's well chuffed. He hits the ball a long way but rarely with accuracy, I won't be surprised if a Titleist ProV crashes through the stained glass windows to join us in church.

Tonight I feel will be the low point of my holiday since the Russon Boca Raton crew have nominated it as their 'sushi night'. I cannot stand sushi, life's most pointless dish, so unfulfilling that you need a bag of chips afterwards. I'll probably boycott tonight's family meal and sit in my room listening to a podcast of The Archers instead, I've the omnibus to catch up on.

Have a good weekend everybody.

Golf o'clock

Today's contribution of stuff and nonsense is brought to you early since I've some serious golf watching to do. Don't tell mother but it's 2.30am and I'm interrupting my fourteen day stay in Florida to devote four days solid watching the British Open on telly. In my defence the five hour time lag means the coverage will finish by 2pm local time so that leaves time for a run and a dip before the highlights come on later.

I've been here for a week now so my mind turns to gifts and souvenirs to take back to Blighty. It'll be standard fare I expect; Hershey's chocolate, NYC baseball caps, Stars & Stripes themed tat of all varieties, I'm so predictable. I might have left it too late to send postcards, always a bit of a faux pas to arrive home ahead of your postcards but I look set fair to achieve that distinction yet again. My tan is beginning to take shape, that's to say my face and neck are brown, the rest of me remains whiter than the driven snow. The last timer a Russon got a tanning it was a 7&6 defeat at Stonehaven Golf Club in the 80s and no I'm not naming the chap who delivered it, his ego's already the size of Dundee. 

In a somewhat surreal scene, the family Labrador (Charlie) is chasing a frog around the dimly lit backyard. It's had the better of him for a good ten minutes now so he might as well come back inside to watch the golf with me. Since it's only 2.30am I'm trying not to wake the children but Chris's TV only has two settings; loud and deafening, praps I'll put it on mute instead. The tea in America is undrinkable and there's no milk left for my coffee so I'm refreshment free at present, not a great start to the day but I shouldn't be starting it at 2.30am anyhow I s'pose.

Tonight I'm dragging Chris out on a 5k run, see this link for confirmation as to why he's agreed to it. I've been running every day since I arrived here so fully expect to wipe the floor with him unless he borrows Coralea's scooter. This holiday has been great for me, taught me plenty about myself if that doesn't sound too anal. It does sound too anal but I don't know how else to put it. I'll be disappointed to leave Florida when the day comes (July 27th in case any readers want to pick me up from Aberdeen airport 😬) but I'm gonna be raring to go when I get back. And on that bombshell I'll return to the golf, I don't want to waste any of the forthcoming ten hours coverage. Over and out from me, Charlie and an exhausted frog still hopping around the backyard for dear life.